What an eventful year it has been! I am so grateful to Facebook which reminds me that one of my biggest events this year was purchasing a shirt displaying a cat in an astronaut (a cat-stronaut, if you will) suit. #blessed
Similar to the individual who writes the family updates, this year-end summary will be written in the first and third person perspective. Keep in mind, the same person is being talked about the whole time (Matt).
Like most people his age, Matt decided to start a blog this year. Unlike most people, he has managed to write more than five posts without relapsing and going the way of most New Year’s resolutions. Originally, he wanted to be featured on the many LDS web sites to “go viral.” Now he realizes that to be featured, you must make obscure references on how being LDS is like [insert pop culture reference here], or make absurd, eye-rolling lists. Refusing to lower his writing abilities to these levels, he now uses blatant sarcasm to make fun of these same things.
Having seen his writing skills improve with each post, he became inspired to write a memoir of his life – until he realized that no one wants to read about the time he stuck two rocks in his ear, or when he sliced his butt open while working in a kitchen.
In April, I concluded a 7-year road to obtain a 4-year degree and graduated with a degree in finance (pronounced “fin”-ance by graduates to appear more mature (pronounced ma-tour by old people)). Although I was constantly made fun of by both students and teachers for my decision to go more into nonprofits, that hasn’t stopped BYU from continually asking for donations. My friends who graduated in film and humanities have yet to be solicited.
Matt has decided to pursue a career in healthcare administration and has been spending the year working towards that goal. In March, he attended the ACHE Congress (which means nothing to most people) and had the opportunity to brown-nose with some of the biggest names and leaders in healthcare. Unfortunately, most of these people will not remember him due to the fact there was an open bar during the closing banquet. While the leaders of large healthcare systems and the deciders of national health policies were getting plastered and saying things they’d regret later, the straight-laced Mormon kid stood in the corner finishing off the hors d’oeuvres.
I had the opportunity to travel to Asia this summer for business and pleasure. To avoid swarms of Asian women (and ladyboys) attempting to come back with me to the States, I shaved my head. It wasn’t until I arrived that I realized my mistake: I am Caucasian and hair had nothing to do with it. Being able to maneuver out of some potentially compromising situations, I made it back to America single and alone.
Despite putting it off as long as possible, Matt has finally embraced adulting (not to be confused with adultering). After he returned from Asia, he subscribed to the Wall Street Journal to become a more informed citizen, was hired at SelectHealth, dresses up for work, and listens to NPR during the commute. His friends still in school have noticed these differences and do not like who he has become. It’s a good thing he is making new friends twice his age at work. Now instead of discussing things such as dating and marriage with his old friends, he now talks about the shifting political climate, pet health, appliances, and health insurance. He lives an exciting life now.
It has been a good year. I have my health, family, and a new recipe for Oreo Truffles. This time next year, I will be in graduate school based out of either Washington, Texas, or Alabama with my shiny new gift from Uncle Sam: $100,000 in student loans!
Singing Hymns and Hymns about Him,